Mnemonic Techniques Gifts

How Not to Remember Names

'I sent out for everything.'

Domestic Goddess.

"Even if forced to slave all day, in my mind I'll always play!"

Party time.

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

I'm currently working on my autobiography. Would you care to help make page 327 interesting?

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

"I believe in the carrot-and-stick approach, Dempsey."

Fisher, this memo of yours, it needs more punch

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

Graduation day at Telekinesis School.

In/Out/How did this end up on my desk?

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

"He thinks he learned a new trick - I don't have the heart to tell him it's just an old trick he forgot he knew."

Amnesia Clinic: "Take one of these pills whenever you remember to."

'Do you have anything for absent-mindedness?'

"This one comes with a special undo function for erasing any stupid thing you've done or said in your entire life. It doesn't really work, of course, but it's SUPER fun to play with!"

'After you with the camouflage.'

'They decided to immure the ladrone in a drogue.'

How to Improve Your Memory Seminar.

'Carb or non-carb section?'

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

'Howard's short stay in the hospital was good for both of us. He finally appreciates my cooking.'

The psychiatrist.

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

"I read the Tibetan Book of the Dead, but I wasn't Enlightened. . . but I did get the munchies."

'All right. Who's in charge around here?'