Misunderstanding Lover T-Shirts

"We've found the problem. You folks don't own a car."

Laurel, you've got to find a hobby over the summer. You're my hubby. I said hobby. That's what I said. You said hubby. Really. Are you asking what I think you're asking? What's happening? This is so sudden.

'The school. My counselor told me to make the most of it...'

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

"This city is becoming unlivable."

Grass saying: mow me/feed me/weed me/roll me.

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

'Oh, now that's a nice vase...'

A dead Olive found stabbed, in a Cocktail drink

'Wellington!...Come take a look at this!...I've never seen anything like it!...Some sort of early sun worship etching perhaps!'

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

She's disappointed. Doctor Frankenstein's online dating profile simply says that he's a "body-builder."

Why do we have pistols? I thought we were back-to-back to see who is taller!

"Online I said I was 'blond and curvy', I didn't say I was a woman!"

"Rayna's been kidnapped! And its all my fault!"

'The school counselor says I have well-developed motor skills. Will you bring me a car?'

He claims to be a Freudian, but he's Jung at heart.'

"It's that time of year when guys randomly explode."

Fortune Teller looks aghast at what she shes in her crystal ball.

"I told him to trim a couple of inches off the middle and he thought it was a fat remark."

'Big Tony said I'll be sleeping with the fishes. I think he's gonna take me to an aquarium!'

"What? The invitation said, wear your favorite mask."

'No, I thought you were John Simpson.'

'Mrs. Peterson. . . Sgt. O'Leary here, I'm afraid there's been an accident and your husband is in a comma.'

'A simple bottle would have sufficed for your specimen, Mr Thomas.'

'I feel awful. Coach was clutching his throat and turning blue, but I thought it was the 'bunt' sign.'

'See! I told you my dad is a boxer!'

"Guess who expires next..."

A ghost in bed with the Grim Reaper

"We were out of embalming fluid so we stuffed your wife with wild rice."

"Oh, don't mind him. He comes here to get warmed over."

"Another double-header."

"We're not that kind of SWAT team, ma'am."

'I've seen this before officer...when 'Rock, Paper and Scissors' gets out of hand.'

'...and then, when I asked if I could see her home, she showed me a photograph of her house.'