Misunderstanding Lover T-Shirts

"We've found the problem. You folks don't own a car."

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

"This city is becoming unlivable."

Grass saying: mow me/feed me/weed me/roll me.

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

'Oh, now that's a nice vase...'

A dead Olive found stabbed, in a Cocktail drink

'Wellington!...Come take a look at this!...I've never seen anything like it!...Some sort of early sun worship etching perhaps!'

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

"Rayna's been kidnapped! And its all my fault!"

"Online I said I was 'blond and curvy', I didn't say I was a woman!"

'The school counselor says I have well-developed motor skills. Will you bring me a car?'

He claims to be a Freudian, but he's Jung at heart.'

Fortune Teller looks aghast at what she shes in her crystal ball.

"It's that time of year when guys randomly explode."

"I told him to trim a couple of inches off the middle and he thought it was a fat remark."

'Big Tony said I'll be sleeping with the fishes. I think he's gonna take me to an aquarium!'

'No, I thought you were John Simpson.'

'Mrs. Peterson. . . Sgt. O'Leary here, I'm afraid there's been an accident and your husband is in a comma.'

"What? The invitation said, wear your favorite mask."

'A simple bottle would have sufficed for your specimen, Mr Thomas.'

'I feel awful. Coach was clutching his throat and turning blue, but I thought it was the 'bunt' sign.'

'See! I told you my dad is a boxer!'

"Guess who expires next..."

'I've seen this before officer...when 'Rock, Paper and Scissors' gets out of hand.'

'...and then, when I asked if I could see her home, she showed me a photograph of her house.'

"Another double-header."

"Oh, don't mind him. He comes here to get warmed over."

"We were out of embalming fluid so we stuffed your wife with wild rice."

A ghost in bed with the Grim Reaper

'This is a textbook case of homicide.'