Mistake Analyst Pillows

"I know it's a botch up. . . but it is a world class botch up?"

Love at First Sight

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

Truth

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"I'd like to be a shake-it-off kind of person, but I'm more of a cling-to-it-and-focus-on-it-until-it's-irrevocably-weaved-into-my-psyche sort of gal."

How to Do Small Talk??!!

Man jumping into swimming pool with phone.

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

'Where was I on the night of the 7th of August? I was home washing my hair.'

"No, it's twist and THEN turn."

"I woke up early, took a shower, got dressed for work then remembered I don't work today."

'Eject! Eject, eject eject!! Aw crimony. I've hit the button 6 or 7 times, Cap'n. And the darned CD still won't come out.'

"Duh!"

'Some things are better left unsaid but I never know what they are until after I've said them.'

"Study Henderson's career closely. He's made all the mistakes so you don't have to."

"Frank, you idiot! That's a Piñata."

"John, the bees go on the outside."

'I was not prepared for this!'

'Alright! Alright! So I made a mistake!'

"You can make your own mistakes when you can hire your own lawyer."

'You haven't much experience in plant conservation, have you Winthorpe?'

"Elves, Jerry, I asked for elves."

Big deal - give her the one from that screwball who came in last week.

Big Business : "He never makes the same mistakes twice. Every day he discovers new ones."

'What a trip I had - I accidentally got on a drone.'

"Dad, I made a mistake. A big mistake."

"Oh, is that today?"

This one? I left the lens cap on.

'Silly me, Ralph. I sprayed you with catfish scent instead of mosquito repellent.'

"One time you blurred the line between fantasy and reality."