Misinterpretation Explorer Pillows

"Till now I always thought of the gravy train as a good thing."

Love at First Sight

"My guess it's guacamole."

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'Wellington!...Come take a look at this!...I've never seen anything like it!...Some sort of early sun worship etching perhaps!'

"I learned that Moses partied on the Red Sea today."

"Online I said I was 'blond and curvy', I didn't say I was a woman!"

'Mrs. Peterson. . . Sgt. O'Leary here, I'm afraid there's been an accident and your husband is in a comma.'

"...But I don't want to get in the back Norma, I want to stay in the front with you"

Dyslexic Doomsayers.

'- but I didn't think it meant a two-made-into one-suit, dammit!'

"You can make your own mistakes when you can hire your own lawyer."

You are here...

"That isn't what the doctor meant by 'push fluids'."

'...and then, when I asked if I could see her home, she showed me a photograph of her house.'

"Look, told ya – it’s a Romney poster!"

"Are you mad at me or just chewing tobacco?"

'And here you can see one of the incredibly boring amusement park rides that were so beloved in the 20th century.'

'You idiot, I said 'ark', not 'park'.'

'I sincerely thank you for your concern, but I'm only setting up a swing.'

"So where's the baby cheeses we heard so much about?"

'Did you or did you not tell me to collect the glasses?'

'He must be pleased with me. He's wagging his finger.'

"Will you pull your stupid pants up? This is a RETINAL scanner you idiot."

'Help me out!"

"Try to understand … I never said you had big feet.''

'What do you mean, 'No warranty??' The user manual does not say that I can't send a Cappuccino by email!'

we take plastic - "The sign doesn't mean we take plastic coins."

"Apologetics does not mean saying sorry."

'men have no idea how to take action.'

"I want them to lay boiled eggs."