Miscommunication Buff Pillows

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

'When I asked to go somewhere nice and warm, I didn't mean inside your trendy jumper.'

"Self-isolation, not self-immolation."

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

Letter Collecting Nerd

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

'Let us pray...'

"I meant the dog!"

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

The Horn of Unanswered Email

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

"Cancel my landline...are you crazy?"

"That's his answer to everything!"

Communication Breakdowns

"I need a more interactive you."

"I was pretty highly respected until email came along."

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

'You know, she's right. It wouldn't kill you to do a little gathering every now and then.'

"We advised viewer discretion and they all decided not to watch."

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

Post Office: Why Not E-Mail It?

"In closing, let me tell you that never in the universe have I spoken before such an attentive audience."

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

"The Doctor is just wonderful!! He listens to all my irrelevant, boring stories!"

"Elective surgery? But I'm not even registered to vote!"

"I may have waffled, but I never lip-synched."

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

'OK, let's start there. When did you first realize you weren't very compactible?'