Mischievous Cook Pillows

'Honey, did you put the Tabasco Sauce in Ben's dish by mistake?'

'Mm...diabolical!'

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

Pinocchio's nose used by cat as a scratching post

Kitchen Kapers

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

Recombinant DNA Lab. I'm crossing a pine tree, pumpkin and bunny --- You can use it for three holidays!

Cooking With Pollock.

"Come on dear. It's getting late, and you have to be up early to collect your pension."

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

Babies who Lunch.

Pants Uglifier!

Misery lit...

'Nice of them to invite us to a dance.'

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

Law Books

Children playing in a library

'It might be a satanic cult: Not only did they chop his head off, they're stuffing his body with bread now...'

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'Surely you're not going to believe everything you see!'

'Looks like a chipmonk.'

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

"Check this out! My ew app imitates the sound of the door bell and makes the dog go berserk."

"When I run away, put my picture on t-shirts instead of milk cartons."

I shall not insult my stupid, fat, idiotic, ugly, lousy teacher...

"He really likes to play with the mice before he kills them"

Leaving pet shop, boy says to puppy: 'You're my bitch now.'

'How many times have I told you not to play with matches?'

'We bought it as a bonsai tree!'

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

What's wrong with the TV? IT keeps changing to the cartoons! (son sitting behind mom with the remote control).