Mischievous Foodie Pillows

'Have you seen my husband? I left him by the lobster tank a few minutes ago!'

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

Babies who Lunch.

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

Misery lit...

"If dinner was a reality TV show broccoli would be the first thing I'd vote off!!"

"Pecan pie with rum-raisin ice cream is the best revenge."

'These are my dieting glasses. They magnify the food so I think I'm eating more than I really am.'

'Surely you're not going to believe everything you see!'

'You'd better cut it into six pieces I don't think I could eat eight!'

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

Law Books

'I'll trade you, sight unseen.'

Children playing in a library

"When I run away, put my picture on t-shirts instead of milk cartons."

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.

"....My wife and I are strict humanitarians."

From the Big Book of Childhood Realizatons: No. 3,271

Welcome at the Healthful Restaurant. We allow neither cholesterol, GM food, colourings, dust nor guests.

The Toast Hunter

Naughty Food

'Stop text-messaging your alphabet soup.'

"Mmm, a stinky cheese sandwich!"