Mirror Whisperer T-Shirts

"You are a very beauty woman. May I buy you a coke?"

"Yes, we now have smart mirrors that can read your mood."

'Do you have a larger suit in the same size?'

'Hey, I'm no longer an ugly duckling! Now I'm an ugly duck!'

"My analysis is you're selfie obsessed!"

Woman applying makeup

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

He can lean back in contentment on cowslip banks and let everything wash over him.

Computer Expert

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

He then drew a number of smaller pie charts behind the bigger chart. That helped to put it into perspective.

But there are other pleasures still for the fisherman's delight....for nature is everywhere about him.

Before putting on your armor...always check for mice!

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

He is happy to take almost any kind of fish...

Harris, our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done.

Product Testing Department

"Good grief, Wilson! At least act like you're enjoying it! It's for my blog!"

'Hey, I used that model once!'

'Wow, swimming IS great exercise! The bathroom scale I put down here shows I'm 20 pounds lighter!'

'The spots are much clearer.'

Water: the first medicine

I love geeks

'I want all of you to pay attention as though your job depended upon it.'

"I'd better go -- I think my wife's menopause has arrived."

"I actually find this way of fishing very relaxing..."

'I've decided to spread the blame...unevenly of course.'

"?"Psychoanalysis for Dummies"?

'Wow! How did you catch something smaller than the bait you were using?'

Tunnel of Mice

"Try S instead of L."

'Maybe we should have ordered bottled water.'

Psychoses on tape