Mirror Detective Gifts

"So if you don't want to know the final score, look away from your TV screen now."

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

Elusive Shadow.

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

Office of the PR of the United States

Weird – I think everything they watch is called, That actor looks so familiar what else have we seen him in.

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

'... Because it's the law! That's why!'

'So now you sniff out drugs. That's it, no more TV cop shows.'

Violence on TV.

Tony Blair and Blairwash.

"What's wrong with this telescope? I can't see a blasted thing."

"You're so vein."

'Mom, I swear it wasn't me! I didn't touch the cookies!'

"Hey - didn't I see you on TV last night?"

"A minute on the lips"

'I gather this is your first sting operation.'

"I think oral sex is when they just talk about it."

"How come you're always checking the mirrors at home, but never once in the car?!"

"Well, who's it from? I don't take blind submissions."

'I'd love to tell who did it, but I'm protecting my source.'

You Always Get to Be the Good Guy

"Anything?"

'Really, Frank... The late news is so depressing - and it's the same thing every night... Why do you even turn it on?'

Telescopes.

"Man! I gotta stop snacking on that devil's food cake before bedtime!"

SANTA'S WORKSHOP, 'Kris, Kringle, Santa Claus, Father Christmas, Saint Nicholas -- if you're on the level, why all the aliases?'

The Short Hop From Boomer To Delusional

"Darn, I've done it again!"

"Uh-oh!. . . Look out! Where did he come from? Something spooky is going on in this picture...Can you spot it?"

Got anything in high definition?