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Paranormal A-Z...

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

$1: Family Secrets

He looks so natural lying there...

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

"I have a feeling he understands more than we think."

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

A young positivist.

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"Face it -- you resent me for the exploring in depth a world that you take for granted."

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

"Do you see the one who possessed your soul?"

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

Lost Property - Missing Head

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

"I write these in my manager's handwriting, so no one will hate me."

Scarecrow.

"Hi everyone, thanks for channeling in to help me with my ancestry project."

Two men converse secretively

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

'He's not having an affair Ma'am: He goes out at night mainly to chase cars and eat from garbage bins...'

"I love people-watching."

"It's two sizes too big, but it fits."

Catholic Priest Gay Mardi Gras

'You must have something in my size?'

"At least have the decency to send her a text to tell her you're not interested."