Mindful Meditators Gifts

"Would it be possible to speak with the personality that pays the bills."

'I'm worried that I may not be worrying enough about the least of my worries.'

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."

"Look, I'm happy to drop my attachment to ego, but please, don't expect me to give up coffee!"

"Do you have anything that will help me get rid of an irritating mantra?"

'Maybe you just weren't cut out for enlightenment.'

'When I need to think better, I just step outside.'

"Stop getting depressed about the past, you've got to move on."

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

Prisoner of insecurity

"No, there's nothing wrong at my job. That's what's got me worried."

A huge, mind-boggling number.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Where your mind & battle are los

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Counting ribs

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

Dog yoga

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Be Healthy

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"And these are the Fab Four Noble Truths."

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'