Mindful Freakout Artist Gifts

'We provide this relaxing courtyard for employees to explore their freakouts.'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"Fill me in so I can panic too."

A child interrupting family prayers

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

"Did we just paint the house or did it just paint us?!"

"And what if the assailant comes at you from inside your own head."

'Damn sea monkeys.'

"Why are we here?"

'You're not creating another thing till you've tidied your room!'

Non Drip Paint

'If all the red warning lights come on, it means meltdown, so get out of the car fast!'

A man jumps out of a window to avoid an injection.

'I can never do anything with my hair phobia.'

'Apparently all my creative juices have seeped into the left side of my brain.'

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

'Oh, I know I get an allowance for cleaning up my room, but I'm on vacation this week.'

Doomsdayers recycle pamphlets in case they are wrong.

Yogi Comedy: A yogi comedian tells a yoga joke. '...is this thing aum?'

"Could you give me just a moment to quietly stir my coffee and pretend my world isn't about to come crashing down around me?"

'Gee, doc, I never thought creative therapy would be like this.'

'It might be all right for some but I'll not have anyone tinkering with my subconscious. Anyway, supposing they found I hadn't got one!'

'You used foul and offensive language when addressing your computer. Well....we've all done that.'

Benjamin Britten.

"Just because the universe is expanding doesn't give you an excuse to expand with it, Fred."

"Pipe Dream"

'Like heck he invented fire -- it was spontaneous combustion from the slob's trash pile.'

"That's my new mantra. . . 'woulda coulda shoulda'?"

"If think my sense of smell is returning."

"You say no one pays attention to you. Why do you think that... oh, wait, I need to take this."

Protect Yourself Psychologically Jung Fu Classes

A painter has painted himself into a tight spot and is stuck.