Millennial Texter Gifts

Couple flirting in Text Language.

Fur Baby

"He's an indoor cat."

Woke Jersey Shore

"Grandpa can't hear you. Turn on your caps lock."

"The season finale of the world is near."

Man reads book entitled: TXTRS DGEST.

"Give me an F-Hashtag."

Baby's first text.

"I moved to the Internet to be closer to my children."

Man bun tending

"I just got a text from my teenage daughter. Do you speak emoji?"

"No, no, no! You're, like, 'I really, really, really love you,' and you're, like, 'Whatever.' "

"...And those are some of the books I would have read if the internet had never been invented."

'I wouldn't say your son's behavior has improved. It's just different. He stopped passing notes to friends in class. Now he's text messaging them.'

Metamorphosis: Nature's Magnificent Reveal

Crybaby Millennials

"Quick, before the shock wave hits."

'Don't email me. I'll email you.'

"If he wags his tail, it's a 'Like'."

"If the average attention span is 8 seconds, why are most commercials 30 seconds?"

Rosemary's Baby Turns Twenty-Seven

Millenial Peacock

Joe couldn't shake off Ruby... his elderly stalker.

"Hi. We're all in the eighteen-to-thirty-four-year-old age group that you're a member of. Come on out and play with us."

"This counts as one wish, by the way."

'Your baby is a girl and holding a cell phone. Apparently, they're texting younger and younger these days.'

"Like my Facebook page."

Public Works Department: Men texting - Merge.

"Then she was like...no way! Then he was like, I didn't know, right here? Then everyone was like, yo dude, it's blue!"

People ride an escalator to the gym.

"So then my mom says to me, 'You're 27 years old with a useless degree in French philosophy, a $67,000 student loan debt, living in our basement...you need to get a job and get out on your own!'..."