Milk Sommelier Gifts

"I told you shaken, not stirred."

"Wait. Let it breathe."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

Mount Olympus Brewery. Those might be dangerous to open. They're Pandora's Bocks.

"He's such a fussy eater."

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

A Tit for Tat.

Keith Floyd.

Just the one...

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

'Mom, the donut is drinking my milk!'

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

'If you're happy to demand feed we'll get along just fine.'

Pig and chicken asking for milk from cow, who replies: 'Sorry, I already gave at the office.'

Nouveau wine

Moses Separates the Cream. . .

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

"Gotta love happy hour!"

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

'This Chardonnay is so over-oaked, it comes with a 2-year service contract from Terminix.'

"I'm in the middle of a local wine tasting tour."

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

'Turn everything off...we've sprung a leak!'

'Are you trying to tell me that neither of you get penalty rates for the 2 a.m feed?'

Take me to your lactator!

"Do you know what kind of bees make milk? Boo-Bees."

The Magic Float