Milk Alternative Fan T-Shirts

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

'MY husband made the coffee table out of an old door.'

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'We've only got a couple of days to finish this box of cereal. Mom'll never let us eat something called energy-packed after school's out.'

"You had me at alternative milk."

"Well, what number sunscreen are you using?"

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

'No fair. Someone ate the popsicle off the stick.'

Smart Arse Meter

Humpty Dumpty to psychiatrist: 'It's like there's this thing inside me that's trying to get out.'

Man riding a bike frame with a cat and a dog attached to harnesses where the wheels would normally be

'Are these eggs fresh enough for you?'

'Mary, watch where you're pointing that thing!'

"Our teeth-cleaning procedure is 100% organic."

Tutti: When all voices sing at the same time.

"I guess I shouldn't have asked for the cherries jubilee to go!"

"Can you make me a tall Tazo chai latte with soy milk?" Bartleby, the soon-to-be-unemployed barista.

"My new boyfriend is free range!"

Milk...Milk...Anything but MILK!!

'If powdered milk's your thing! I'm your gal!'

"Should anyone present think Dan’s tree-hugging has gone off the rails, speak now or forever hold your peace."

'I am on a holiday from hell.'

'This little baby runs on solar, electric power, hydrogen, bio-fuel...practically anything but gas!'

'How about using a knife like everyone else?'

"Relax, honey — they’re apples."

'Shake!...Good dog.'

"It was either him or me."

'Looks like a great job!'

'We're gonna kill 'em with obesity.'

"Hey! Where's our regular driver?"

US congress unpopularity.