Military Ethics Ponderer T-Shirts

'Radio active depleted uranium dump'

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"Call me?"

Who gets the anti-corona vaccine?

Water company bonus.

The Price of Freedom

'What I lack in cognitive flexibility, I make up for in moral flexibility.'

"If anything else, it beats bending over!"

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

"These are the care instructions. And if things don’t work out, there’s a recipe on the back."

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

'Sure, we kill a few innocent people with drones, but think how many innocent people die in auto accidents.'

Surgical Self-Service

"Facebook VP — you'll be in Circle No. 4."

"I love it, the chief loves it, the client loves it, but the gods don't love it."

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"And if the golf area of the brain was somehow destroyed, there might be a little something extra in it for you."

30% Heredity, 70% Environment

Biblical Jewish Medical Ethics

"You can't have it both ways, kid."

"I may have waffled, but I never lip-synched."

"It's official, Michael has filed for moral bankruptcy."

"Don't you think after thirty years of marriage you could stop referring to me as 'the military'?"

"You're in luck! Business ethics is a grey area, we're sending you back!"

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

"Right, we could go with the ethical decision, but let's not panic yet."

'Don't tell me this nonsense doesn't violate the code of bioethics.'

'Do everything ethically ... within reason, of course.'

'I imagine you were pretty nervous addressing an army of experts.'

"You cheated on the assignment and got an A? Glad to see you've learned a useful life skill."

Pentagon Science Contest: 'Hey, Jeffrey...why do you think the military wants to figure out how they can send people to another solar system?'

"Hey, Gary? As a general rule we don't play God up here."

"We love your results. We're just a weeny bit concerned about your methods."

'But what if you're a masochist...?'