Ethical Ponderer T-Shirts

'Don't tell me this nonsense doesn't violate the code of bioethics.'

'Do everything ethically ... within reason, of course.'

Animal to human transplant - 'This is a consent form.'

'When you awaken you will feel fresh and relaxed with absolutely no memory of changing my lightbulbs.'

"Nothing about selling inside trade secrets?"

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"

'To cheat or not to cheat that is the question!'

"How many bad habits do you have to have to equal once vice?"

"We found the vaccine for covid-19!"

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

Man looking for missing person. Foot coming out of the mouth of a mounted Lion's head.

Judgment day: 'Ignorance is bliss!'...'But it's no excuse!'

Stain on your conscience

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

'Cloned mouse' 'Cloned cheese' 'Cloned mousetrap'

'Of course I'm telling the truth. I only lie to people who pay me!'

The Price of Freedom

Mort, let me ask you a hypothetical question. Ok. Suppose a businessman – oh, let's say, a cafe owner – were to discover his electric bill was too high … Yes? … and then he discovered, almost simultaneously, that a third of his elderly clientele wore pacemakers. Now, given all this … do you think his elderly patrons might react negatively … if the businessman strapped them to his generator and siphoned some of their battery power? Hypothetically speaking, of course. You're an evil, evil man!!!

'If you can't make ends meet, how can they justify the means'

Surgical Self-Service

The Legend of Art Syms, Street Auditor

'I know I told you this wouldn't hurt, but, if it does, raise your trunk or something.'

"These drugs in sports are tearing the game apart."

"Remember, son, do unto others as you would have others do unto you but, at the same time, never give a sucker an even break."

"$10.75 for lunch in the cafeteria. The bioethics committee will hear of this."

"I found it this morning when I went to church. It's filled with money!"

"I knew I was doing wrong. That kinda makes me right..."

"Dad, Jason says you're fuelled by greed."

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.