Midnight Munchies Master Pillows

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Secretive Weigh In.

"An everything Martini, please."

Full English Breakfast.

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

Cereal Tasting.

"What the heck did I do with that leftover turkey?!"

"It's the kind of trade you get in a twenty-four-hour-a-day joint."

'Vitamins A, B, C, D...Hey, Mom! - this cereal has all the recommended daily allowance of alphabet in it!'

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

"Hold up ... where’s the ranch dressing?"

"Tia Carmen, I think I'm growing up. I ate five slices of cold pizza at 3 in the morning...and I woke up with a stomachache."

Munch Master.

'I've decided to get serious about losing weight. I moved the refrigerator out of my bedroom.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"Damn it, who ate all the chèvre?"

'Mom, I don't care how high in fiber they are. Broccoli flakes are going to fail as a breakfast cereal.'

'Hello, yes, I'd like to order 200 packs of the sweets you can eat between meals.'

"Damned if they do and damned if they don't? This is BRILLIANT work, everybody! Why didn't we think of this before?"

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

The Cat that Ate the Canary, 3 a.m.

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

Snacks

Parents sleeping with a new baby.

Meditation Munchies

'Hello, Room Service? Send up the works!'

Just say no.

"Do you have a strain that pairs well with Chunky Monkey?"

"It's 8 a.m. somewhere."

Doomed Food Group

"You asked for runny!"

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your willpower is?'