Midnight Investigator T-Shirts

"I wore a wire last night to prove you really snore!"

Late night teddy reading

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

Complexity Made Simple.

"This is not good at all!"

Fingerprint Show

"Wake up. It says here I was right about that thing I said."

Two men converse secretively

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

Angry priest clutching car keys storms into church, saying: 'It's about time the Holy Father made inconsiderate parking a sin.'

Wine...Spirits...

First space criminal investigation

Work related problems for Madame Tussaud

'I'll need four character references.'

"It isn't just the media that's biased... often the voters are too."

The Banana Crime

"Oh, and I've started seeing a therapist."

'Woodruff, find out everything you can on a crazy thing called 'love'.'

"They should talk to you, some of your sermons are like dental surgery"

'My brain's secret life is keeping me up nights.'

'It is a little-known fact that all our energy problems would be solved if kids weren't such total wimps.'

"He'd been drunk,he'd been walking past the zoo...there had been something else, but damn he couldn't remember."

'I did go to the bathroom, but since I was up anyway, I decided to drop in over here.'

'I'd be more excited about you finding your ball if it wasn't three o'clock in the morning.'

'Oh yeah? Well if you're not a vampire, would you care to explain why you have no reflection?'

'Third one this month. Do you always have to analyze everything to death?'

'Exhibit A,,,smoking gun,'

'It's hard to choose. Can you find out if the second one from the left is married?'

"All right, have it your way - you heard a seal bark!"

"You said we should always question our sources, so I did, and now my source wants a word with you."

Trading Standards man entering 'Toys r sus'

Conspiracy theories are just a smokescreen to hide the incredible truth

2 A.M. on a Moonless Night

"Nothing ever happens before midnight."