Midnight Adventurer T-Shirts

"OK, give me something that says, it's two in the morning and you're feeling a little wild."

'It is a little-known fact that all our energy problems would be solved if kids weren't such total wimps.'

Late night teddy reading

2 A.M. on a Moonless Night

'I'd be more excited about you finding your ball if it wasn't three o'clock in the morning.'

'I did go to the bathroom, but since I was up anyway, I decided to drop in over here.'

Transylvanian backpackers.

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'Fried chickens.'

"The club scene is really changing."

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

"Can he call you back? He and his mid-life crisis are celebrating their tenth anniversary."

Speedo Limit: 21 Years

"From Zero To Sixty In What Seems Like Eight Seconds Flat."

The Friday Night Olive Races Down at the Tribeca Martini Bar

'I wish we lived in one of those later time zones.'

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

Party-Crashing Ban

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

Altar Ego

'Parents are so inconsistent. They spend all day avoiding soil loss and all night promoting it.'

"It's only the wind."

"Don't kid yourself. Harold, you're no spring chicken!"

"No doctor, my husband is not sleep-walking again. He is sleep-jumping!"

Little Van Helsing was dissapointed that, again, there was no monster under the bed or in the closet.

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

Cats out late.

Lawrence of Suburbia

"If you sleep walk again tonight, make yourself useful, and take the dog with you."

'I'd like an 'Innuendo' please - a big one.'

Eyes on the Forest Floor

'How do I know your ours?'

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."