Midlife Musings Fan Pillows

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"Think, man! Think! How did you get this old so fast?!"

'Man...You age great!'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

"Remember that, honey? Serious testosterone."

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

"He's got a great future behind him!"

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

Middle Age: When an 'All Nighter' means you didn't have to get up to pee!

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"I don't think your old sports jersey shrunk. I think you grew."

Thoughts of Stephen Harper...

Middle Age - The Magazine For You - Yeah, You!

'Someone told him life begins at forty. Now he's reserving his energies!'

"I'm living proof that life begins at forty-three."

"And so one could say that my work examines art as an expression of objecthood where the object is neither the art nor the object but rather the practice of intentionality."

"I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. I told them to pipe down."

Stuff nervous little dogs yap about.

'No pep, shaky, noisy, overheating. Right. Anything wrong with the car?'

"I've decided to start groaning every time I have to move my body a little bit."

Old Vampire with false teeth.

"I can't go to our high school reunion, no one will recognize me...Hell, I don't recognize me!"

'I can't go on like this Wilfred - you've changed so - You're no longer the man I married.'

'I suppose they call it 'Middle age' because that is where you age shows...'

"In layman's terms, I just rewound your biological clock."

'Dave's really over-reacting about turning forty.'

You know you're getting older when there are more candles on your cake than calories in it!

Blackbeard needed help living up to his name.

'I'm not that concerned about my prostate ... I'm still trying to survive my wife's menopause.'

"No, we're not getting any younger, but why, pray tell, is that such a revelation to us?"

The Sullen 40-To-54-Year-Old Demographic