Midlife Pondering Aficionado Pillows

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

Ed's receding hairline!

Diego Velasquez

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

'I've used up all my eligibilities'

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

'It looks like you're suffering from TMB... too many birthdays...'

Midlife: You Are Here.

"From Zero To Sixty In What Seems Like Eight Seconds Flat."

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

Altar Ego

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

'If I knew it would mean all these hospital appointments, I'd never have got old!'

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

"Don't kid yourself. Harold, you're no spring chicken!"

"You'll see - when you get older, parts start to sag."

"On my taxes, I claimed my inner child as a dependent."

Gerontologist on the phone - 'Oh, you know ... same old, same old ... and how are things with you?'

Phil at Fifty: Still Trying to Find Himself

Adult Book Store. Leaving home. Finding a Job. Getting Married. Buying a House. Raising Kids. Living with Stress.

"I don't think your old sports jersey shrunk. I think you grew."

A Classicist Considers Taking Up The Mambo

An old woman measuring the decreasing height of an old man using a height chart

Middle Age - The Magazine For You - Yeah, You!

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.