Middle Management Maven Gifts

'Never mind your ideas.. how do you come up with your excuses?'

'Remarkable - buried in red tape. We don't often get one from middle management.'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Let's get organized

Jack of all trades

Apples for sale

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"#Win!"

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Creative department

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

Direct Marketing...

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

Trade Show Sherpas

Corporate Team Building. Team. Hey, everybody, I've just been told our CEO fled the country while we've been doing our truth exercises.

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

'Motherhood is great, but I get a really sore back...'

"Just go with the workflow."

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand