Middle-class Dreamer T-Shirts

"I'm pulling down nearly six figures these days. Five, to be exact."

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'It's crunch time, Caldwell. That's the time between when you're born, and when you make your first million.'

The man who invented the wheel/The man who patented the wheel.

'I realize money can't buy happiness, so I'm just trying to improve the exchange rate.'

Investments: Remember, tis better to have loved money and lost, than never to have loved money at all.

"We'd like to take a majority position in your poetry."

'I'm only a millionaires, and there are over 260 billionaires!'

'I think it's nice for kids to have wooden toys.'

"He's very well off. He's got all the quantities I admire."

"Baseball is boring."

"This can't be happening! I'm supposed to be a cool adult! At least I bet I have a cool car!"

"Didn't I tell you that if I kicked up a fuss they'd move us to business class"

"Where'd you get that?"

"Dreaming the impossible dream didn't make me rich. SELLING the impossible dream made me rich!"

"I want to be a footballer's wife."

'It's a rags-to- riches story. You should take the company tour.'

What is possible...

"Hey, and I hear congrats are in order for earning 'Super Elite' status in elevator miles!"

'I tried for a new lease on life, but I got a lousy credit report.'

"Hey, look at this. After only a month, the idea that we spend the last two years developing has attracted $10 on Kickstarter."

"Someday, I'm gonna be valedictorian of my graduating class. Don't you want to be at the top of your class, Baldo?"

The most sought after profession in 2010 is stressed out, middle class, soccer mom on medical marijuana.

Are you crazy? ... You make 10 million dollars a year and you want to know the meaning of life?

"I guess I want what everyone wants - a billion dollars for being a jerk."

'Some of you were wondering, 'what, exactly, does Smedgwick, Refining and Smelting do'?'

Get rich quick scheme! $500-

Have you hugged your money today?

"You don't have to spend a lot of money to have a good time?"

Record soy bean crop

You writers must have an easy life, I've often thought I'd have a bash myself if I had a bit of spare time.

'Is this business class?'

"Praying for money and having the stock market go up, is the easiest way for me to achieve serenity."

"Give us this day our daily gluten-free sliced white ciabatta."

"What is it about me that makes people mistrust my investment advice?"