Michelin Guide Fan T-Shirts

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

On holiday...

'Are we ready to order?'

The Cud Food Guide

"My guess is that you're not the first European here.

"I call it the 'Call Bell', to be rung only for emergencies, like, running out of Coke or something."

Sightseeing Bus

Christmas Presents for the Cat

'I'll see you guys when you get there.'

"Why didn't Lewis and Clark just use GPS?"

'This is the most unusual post & pier construction I've ever seen.'

'Hmm, your luggage seems to have been booked through to India.'

Confidence.

Graceland Tours: Ironic/Non-Ironic

'Do you want tea leaves or the cards?' - 'You mean you don't know.'

Left Way, Right Way and Another Way.

"My other carriage is a Landau."

Finding the Holy Grail of Stero Systems.

Global Positioning System - You are in a traffic jam.

It became clear that the secret door was behind the other bookcase.

'Hmmm, identifiable markings: striped shirt, whistle. Ah, he must be refereeus footballicus.'

'hey, hey, hey! Not in the house! Go outside if you're going to throw your little brother around!'

'I said 'Capistrano', you idiot.'

Three square meals a day.

Nude Travels/Nude Scanner.

Omnibus crashing into a cab but both drivers being very polite

Noisy Train