Messy Living Expert Gifts

'You've had mates around - this place is a tip!'

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

Child Being Dirty in the Bath.

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

Newborn Chaos

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

Darlene, my intelligence tells me that your fiance is a slob. What intelligence, Rudy? Surveillance photos – dirty clothes and towels thrown on the floor. Dishes piled up in the sink. That's my Mel? How did you get those? Top-flight government spy methods. House of Java.net Cybercafe.

'We'll just blame it on the fish.'

'You're a filthy pig, Gordon! I guess that's why I love you so much.'

"Bird of paradise, my ass."

'Don't track mud in the house! 'IT'S NOT MUD! IT'S DOG POO!'

Why children, apples and honey should not be left unsupervised.

'You should apply for government relief. Your room is a disaster area!'

"You've really outdid yourself this time. A real masterpiece!"

'What do you expect Marjorie, I am a grub.'

An occassional clean out should prevent unpleasant smells.

"Instead of cleaning my room, can we just seal the door and call it a time capsule?"

'You must excuse us. Things are a bit upside-down at the moment.'

'Tell me you feel bad about it. The least you can do is feel bad about it.'

"Mum, I can't find my camouflage jacket."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. III

"Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be?" "Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person." "If you think 'being you' includes being dirty, that means you're a dirty, slovenly filth-beast..." "...who will end up alone and miserable because no liv

"How many times did I tell you? Don't put the outdated chargers in the drawer for broken headphones."

"Boss, the cleaning lady is here with her leaf blower to tidy up your office."

"It's a remarkable find...evidence of human habitation that dates to ancient history!"

'I see you had egg for breakfast.' - 'Yesterday morning.'

"Ninety percent of household dust is dried flaky skin."

'Why should I pick up all this stuff? You bought it!'

"Inspiration"

'Really? My mum says my bedroom is a pigsty too...'

"It's been brought to my attention that your cubicle has only a two out of five rating on Tripadvisor."

The others in the office send a poignant message to Frank to stop leaving dirty dishes in the break room.

'Dont worry; that's not a ketchup stain. It's just blood.'