Message Seeker Gifts

Message in a bottle being read by a fish

Castaway Finds Impossible Bottle

Message in a bottle breaks on a rock.

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

Dialogue

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Man Fishing: Pulling sign attached to hook from fish out of water: Gone Swimmin'

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Exit only.

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"I know. I miss him, too."

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

You Are Here...Your Nearest Wi-FI Signal Is Here.

'I wonder if there's a message up there somewhere.'

'Perhaps he's heard we're losing our churchwarden.'

"It's a pizza leaflet..."

Last Reception for 200 Miles.

'My kids don't understand me.'

"Oh, I listen to my body at meal time, but the messages aren't clear because its mouth is full!"

'Why so stony-faced?'

No, I don't have roaming service, I am the roaming service.

"Opportunity came knocking once, but I missed it. I was expecting a tweet."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

'How to speak Woman.'

Cowboy on horse sees diretion sign for 'thataway'.

Customers Wanted

"Better than a hunting dog - she sniffs out wifi hotspots."

'Hello?...still there?...yeah, sorry, I just had to move to get a better signal.'

Abandon all hope of Wifi ye who enter here

Religious Speech

"Luckily, these new life rafts come with a phone, charger and a cell tower."

Unplugged.

"I'm not withholding. I'm busy."

Phone Signal Problems: "Can you hear me now?"