Menu Mediator T-Shirts

"I'm your waiter and a vegetarian. Let's try to do this without anyone getting hurt"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Is the MSG local?"

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

Party time.

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

National Coffee Day

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'Physical or Social Science?'

"How 'local' is the fish?"

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

What's the insect de jour?

A menu with risks and benefits

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

"Our menu never claims that our meat is barbecued. It just says that it's covered in barbecue sauce."

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

"'Market Price' isn't about the food. It's what we think we can charge YOU."

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

'I thought it was your figure you were supposed to be watching !'

"I'm trying to decide between water and sunlight."

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

'If Darwin had been the cook on the Beagle' 'Menu- its Evolution'.

"And here you have a brown thing next to something greenish, with some sort of brown runny stuff underneath it."

Try our frogs' legs