Menu Maestros T-Shirts

Expectations vs. reality

"Remember-it's NOT keep-the-chef-in full employment week!"

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Presentation: Thinking each other are idiots.

"You're good at asking all the right questions. Now let's hear some right answers."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'What'll it be?'

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

Two plans - one long-term and one short-term.

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

National Coffee Day

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

"I'm unable to process this image."

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

"At the end of the day Simon, money talks!"

'Daddy is going off to stimulate the economy by making gobs of money.'

"Well, it could be the rising tide of consumer indifference to our company's latest product, or it might be the sink in the men's bathroom acting up again. We're still not sure."

'Ooops! My mistake. That was the yearly budget estimate, no the monthly estimate.'

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'Enter, His Royal Globalness...'

The Acme Agency: Dedicated to life, liberty and the pursuit of media exposure.

"How 'local' is the fish?"

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'