Mental Health Humor Enthusiast Gifts

'And how often have you had the reversal symptoms?'

Psychiatrists Desk Trays - In Denial and Out of Touch.

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Psychobabbling brook.

T-Shirt reads: 'Out of mind, I won't be back.'

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

'Look at you. You're a basket case.'

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

'Life's little wonders are too big for me.'

"Legally, I have the right to talk as slowly and boringly about all your options as I want."

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

"You dawdle, daydream. You make lists of things to do but can't get started. You seem to be restricted from doing what you know you should be doing. These problems will dissolve when you read Chapter Ten of my new book, at eight dollars and ninety-five cents."

'Actually, I'm a placebo psychiatrist.'

'Yes, we are going in circles. How do you feel about that?'

'It's not my childhood that traumatised me. It's the size of your bills.'

Psychobabble.

"Therapist: Six couches no waiting"

"So, Michael, any pesticidal thoughts today?"

"Every now and then, I get an overpowering urge to wear a cowbell."

Bob's mother drove him crazy - but at least she came to visit.

"You do realise that you are not the only client scheduled this morning?"

Fakir Shrink.

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

Shrink's Summer Job

Are you getting enough "me" time, Al? Oh, more than enough, Doctor

"Westwood psychiatric group... How may I direct your cry for help?"

"I don't feel like I'm making any progress, it's like I'm just chasing my tail again."

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

"I can't afford therapy. The inner child support payments alone are killing me."

'Oh, Freud is too darn hard to read -- I switched to Dr. Phil years ago.'

'My therapist suggested I redirect my anger into landscaping and gardening!'