Memory Curator Gifts

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I wish I had emotions like people do. I wish I could think as logically as people do. I'd like to take a walk along the shoreline without rusting. Storing energy in a battery rather than a pot belly would be nice. Having a sense of humor would be fun. The ability to selectively delete memories would be great to have. I wish I didn't have to worry about digital viruses. I wish I didn't have to worry about biological viruses.

"With proper editing, I've had a good life."

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

Photographer Phone: 'Okay everybody, SMILE!'

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

You had me at vintage.

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"I remember that game of Spin-the-Bottle like it was yesterday. It was love at firstspin."

Board Game Hunter

A boy with a camera

Appointments and Disappointments

'Lost Diary'

"... And in the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, please tweet with the hashtag #FeelinTheBreeze."

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

Hi again

If You See Something You Want, Whine!

"What's the first thing you remember?" "Why do you ask?" "Because it'll help the cosmologists." "Come again?" "Cosmologists have discovered a lot about the universe. In 1990, they discovered cosmic microwaves are 'black body radiation.'" "What that means is, they discovered the microwave radiation that fills the universe conforms exactly to a pattern known as a 'black body spectrum' that was predicted by models of the Big Bang." "English!!!" "They proved the Big Bang happened." "But one of the b

"Forget the future, tell me what happened to the past ten years."

Amnesiacs Convention.

"I have the new list of approved tweets."

Hi! You want to, like, hang out? Sure. When are you free? Twig! Time to pack. We're leaving!! In about a year? It's on my iCal.

My own museum.

Bear Office Worker

"Hurry, hurry! When you get back, we'll finish rehashing 1924 and get right on to 1925!"

"Hey! This was rubber stamped!"

Businessman wonders why he called a meeting.

"Hey, Frankie, remember me? Summer of '88—we were twelve and you buried me up to my neck and left me to die."

"Forget-me-nots! Wait. Didn't I get these last week? Who gave these to me? Wait. Why did I come in here?"

"I'd like to introduce our guest speaker, here to speak about the phenomenon of deja vu."

'He says he's an old friend from your childhood.'

'Oy! Zadie, I think we need a bigger house!'

"That's your granddad - amazing what they can do with filters these days."

'Cheese.'

I always frame yours, J.B.