Melody Munchers T-Shirts

Bagpipe Horns.

"How's everything here? Let's start with your earliest childhood memories."

Cereal Tasting.

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

Alphabet soup

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

"Tia Carmen, I think I'm growing up. I ate five slices of cold pizza at 3 in the morning...and I woke up with a stomachache."

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

'No booze, no red meat, easy on the carbs...I've given up living so I can live longer.'

'Hello, yes, I'd like to order 200 packs of the sweets you can eat between meals.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"Oh, I listen to my body at meal time, but the messages aren't clear because its mouth is full!"

A worm sits in comfort as he has just eaten 4 apples by himself...

'Nostradamus enjoyed singing in the tub'

Boxing with your harp

'And a one, and a two, and a three, and a four...'

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'

"Hang on - this one's a Malteser!!"

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

"I hate how we stigmatize eating by calling it a feeding frenzy."

Meditation Munchies

'I can't believe it. Wagner just must be better than he sounds!'

'Diet!...Diet!...Diet!...'

"So … ribs for lunch?"

Al's Health Spa: You are what you eat.

'I'd like the low-cal enchiladas, the low-sodium corn chips, and the diet margarita.'

"Just one menu for us, please. We don't want to overeat."

'Of course on this new diet, I only count the calories of the food I eat whilst other people are in the room.'

Actually, it's healthier to eat smaller meals more often throughout the day.

Thoughtful kiddies' midnight snacks overtax my bulging slacks … The load I haul back to my shack is bigger than the one I packed.

'Hello, Room Service? Send up the works!'