Molecular Muncher T-Shirts

"Hang on - this one's a Malteser!!"

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

Alphabet soup

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

"I just spoon-fed the media a pound of really old salmon."

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

'You know, I could really go for a wafer-thin mint.'

'Your manuscript was delicious.'

'Hello, yes, I'd like to order 200 packs of the sweets you can eat between meals.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"They're sound bites."

'Let me have 20% fat, 40% carbohydrate, 40% protein and a cup of tea,'

"The starred items are hot and spicy."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

'Haven't you heard? We're not going to discuss the company picnic - this is the company picnic.'

A vampire using ground pepper on his new victim.

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

"Of course, he always says it's not fit for consumption. He's a foodie."

Theater Usher Moms.

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

Motivation

"I can't...I mustn't...I shouldn't...I needn't....but I will."

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your willpower is?'

Santa contemplates whether or not to leave presents.

'Whoa! Our waiter's online and you should see what he's saying about your tip!'

"Yeah, it's so much better than the Jung-and-Run over on 7th."

Our menu is legendary. Really? Do you serve leg of Sasquatch? That's my favorite legend! Menu.

'Let's get these bite-size snacks to have with our bite-size news.'

Man eating 'after work mints'

"Since when can this company afford bagels?"

"It appears it's middle was licked out."

'Perhaps one of you gentlemen would mind telling me just what it is outside the window that you find so attractive?'