Melody Hacker Gifts

Cheating Composer

Golfing Bishop.

Weird things I do because of the internet

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

Tonight: Wagner's Ring Tone Cycle.

'Champions league'

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

'I store all my data in the cloud.'

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

'Life if so much simpler since we called Family Ref.'

'Now, now...no stealing people's data until you finish your brussels sprouts.'

Golfing with God.

Musical Note Nail

"I love these fitness bracelets! it's like having a tamagotchi, but the tamagotchi is you."

'Every time I manage to learn the second verse of a song, I forget the first one.'

"The piano's in tune, but the house is a little flat."

"A hacker logged into my fitness tracker and stole my steps!"

A dog banging a snare drum.

'People aren't happy enough...I want a 15% increase in happiness by the 1st of the month or heads will roll!'

Secrets of Adulthood.

'Teddy, someone from the Pentagon wants to talk to you about drones in Pakistan, whatever that means.'

A bird tweets along with a musician.

Finally, I found a good use for that leak.

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

music store

'The company hired a therapist to improve our morale.'

Excess Baggage: People will do almost anything to avoid paying those fees for checked baggage.

"Sorry for the delay. Someone in hell hacked into our computers!"

'Confirming the belief that music and math are related, I will now sing some lovely French equations.'

The Pecks state of well being

"Era un gato grande... Que hacia ro ro..."

'Okay, now try it in the gear of 'D'.'

"I'm starting my diet today."

Life bingo