Meeting Humor Aficionado Pillows

'And Mr Feldmore's mooning of the other committee members was interpreted as the only 'nay' vote...'

I don't think we'll bother using graphics at this year's shareholders' meeting.

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Zombie standup

Police Feline Unit

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"What's a patent?"

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

Love at First Sight

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Easter Island legs

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Cat box"