Mediocrity Musings Gifts

'Though we must innovate, and though we must grow, we must never lose sight of our core mediocrities.'

Paul Ree

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

Why the discovery of the New World took longer than expected.

'A lackluster style got me to where I am, and a lackluster style is going to keep me here.'

"If you don't like the chicken, perhaps we can have the air marshal shoot a goose."

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

"I'm sorry—the agency told me they'd cleared away last summer's people."

'I don't really have a personal best. I'm just sort of OK all the time.'

Trump supporters raise the Nazi flag after Charlottesville.

The idea for tiny drink umbrellas is conceived.

'You know you're 40 when...'

The Snowpire

Near-Death Excuses...

British Occupation of Peking-Opium Wars

'Sorry we've run out of money for meds but I can offer you this fantastic free mug and fridge magnet with our new logo.'

"While you're not busy we've a few more things we'd like you to do!"

Retraining Unit

Blair's Blood Money.

"President Erdogan said that he is much more than just a politician. From now on it's illegal to depict him."

'Well you should be able to see other countries around Britain...there's nothing wrong with the equipment.'

'. . . You're starting an anti-social network. . .'

"And on the 5th day, God's agent negotiated digital content rights..."

What really happened to Macron's Tree....

Puppet therapy

'And since you're a public figure, you have the right to apologize and get away with it.'

"I just wanted to call you after the synagogue shooting to let you know your community has my support."

Chuck Hagel finally confirmed as Secretary of Defense.

'Well, I've told President Bush that war never can be a solution!' (Putin wearing 'Support our boys in Chechnya' badge.)