Medieval Music Gifts

Early Music Festival

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

"We're following Carrot Top."

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

Knight feeding his kids.

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

"He's his own worst enemy."

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

Hildegard von Bingen

Joust Sharpener

"The knights of the round accent table"

Swiss army knife

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

"Early model of baggage claim"

'Isn't it cute the way they compete so hard?'

TV jester.

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

"Oh great, the printer is down."

Medieval Vacation: 'What? I am relaxed. I'm relaxing!'

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

Sir gawain had been duped....it was a damson in distress