Medieval Madness Pillows

DING DONG!

"First they're sending in the diplomats."

"Poureth no more - My cup runneth over!"

"Heh, I've left a pin on his seat."

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

"Early model of baggage claim"

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

'Spell checker!'

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

Viking sitting patiently while his wife winds her wool on his helmets horns to sort it out.

"But I use all of them!"

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

"Is 'family' friend of foe?"

Once you get the shells off they're really quite tasty.

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

'It's okay, they're with me.'

Medieval King

Lovers

Knights

Knight with paint tin on his head.

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

King Richard I

A popular stall at the Giant Sunday Pack Horse Contents Sale in Newark.

"Nothing like a good stretch before looting and burning."

"Ground score!"

Knight of the sandcastle.