Medieval Lore Gifts

"The road head is filled with danger. Take this lawyer for protection."

Good morning! My name's Julian, and I'll be your torturer today!

A knight dragging an unwilling maiden

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

Joust Sharpener

"Buddy, you are screwed! Hey Jimmy, come see this!"

Night of the Round Tables

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

Lady of the bath...

"I'm sorry, this is all very embarrassing but we've decided to open a pub together."

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Knight Golfing

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

"Early model of baggage claim"

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Man is caught swimming on an inflable float in a moat by the knights.

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

The Beard in the Stone

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Missing You.

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'Actually, there's no interview necessary. Just pull out the sword and the job's yours.'

'I think they're up to something.'