Medicinal Cannabis User Gifts

"Your dad hasn't been quite the same since he started taking C.B.D. oil."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

Cannabis: Anti-seizure Medication

"Made with a little extra TLC – and THC for good measure."

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

"Shoulda brought the weed."

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Stocks are down. Bonds are down. Terrorism and natural disasters are up. Ask your doctor if medical marijuana is right for you...'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"Nah, dude, I'm Tokey Bear. Smokey's on vacation. Hey you got any snacks?"

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

"Medical marijuana hotline...press hash to continue."

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

"Could you give me enough medicinal cannabis so that I forget about Brexit?"

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.

"Lately my joints are stiff." "You're rollin' 'em too tight. Try vaping."

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

"My joints... are almost done"

"I can't wait until we're older so we can get into the cannabis industry. At least then we can make a difference in people's lives."

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

'I'm sorry, Leonard, I can't prescribe marijuana for you. Boredom is not a medical problem.'

'What did you do in the drugs war daddy'

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

'We can do extensive blood work, take x-rays, check your prostate. . .or I could sell you some great weed for $50.'

'Wow, the support for legalizing marijuana is really picking up!'

"If you ask me, you can't go wrong with this beautiful bouquet of marijuana."

Has he been smoking dope? Of course, how else do you think we get off the ground?