Medically Curious Gifts

Intensive Care in the Community

"He has a pretty rare blood group."

'I'm sorry, Mrs. Griswald... You've called me so often at my home that you now legally qualify as a friend and I can no longer treat you!"

"I have a pain right here. I think it might be appendicitis."

"Would you say your imaginary pain is more or less severe than last visit?"

"O.K., let's just have a look-see at this pre-mortem."

A Reasonable Time For Concern - 'Hello Crematorium?'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Little doctor.

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

London GPs could become an endangered species.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

Parts Department

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

"Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing on the palate, goes well with cough and cold."

Doctors

'I've been googling your condition and I'm afraid to say...I think I might have it myself.'

Medical Examinations.

'You've a slipped disc in your back and a slipped everything in your front.'

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

'Urology...can you hold?'

'If you begin to feel unwell, start or stop taking aspirin...'

Doctor testing patient reflexes with unusual results.

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

Cardiology, Neurology and Ophthalmology.

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

"Uh-Oh!"

"This feels so familiar."

"It appears you have a virus."