Medical Professional Appreciation Gifts

"Turn your head and cough."

'Long shift?'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

"Could I ask just one question?"

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

'A dog ate my homework.'

Higher wisdom...

'Maths is fun!'

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

Presentation: Any questions?

"This is for the pain and these are for the side effects."

'I think it has reached critical mass.'

'It may well be nesting J.T but damn it, you've got a company to turn.'

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"Keep my fingers crossed! Is that it?"

'Eleven?.. you mean there's more numbers beyond the number of fingers we have?'

The fierce urgency of now - and how to avoid it.

Child: 'If I've got five oranges, and you take away two, wouldn't that be stealing Miss?'

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

The F.B.I.'s Least Wanted.

"OK...for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'My teacher said my penmanship has really improved since I started doing my homework on an inkjet printer.'

'The first person to learn anything leaves immediately!'

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'