Medic Appreciation Gifts

"I'm sorry John, but your back surgery has been placed on back order."

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

"Could I ask just one question?"

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

'A dog ate my homework.'

Higher wisdom...

'Maths is fun!'

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

'Long shift?'

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

Presentation: Any questions?

"Turn your head and cough."

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

'Eleven?.. you mean there's more numbers beyond the number of fingers we have?'

Child: 'If I've got five oranges, and you take away two, wouldn't that be stealing Miss?'

"So you can tweet. That's why you have to learn the alphabet."

"OK...for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

'My teacher said my penmanship has really improved since I started doing my homework on an inkjet printer.'

'The first person to learn anything leaves immediately!'

The F.B.I.'s Least Wanted.

'You don't have a heart murmur, but your liver is muttering.'