Medical Phobia Warrior Pillows

"It's just a little pain. Really...it's nothing!"

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

'Who wants to be examined first?'

"The little stress ball wasn't working."

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

Healthy Patients Only

"I told the doctor about my problems with anxiety and burnout and he wrote me a prescription for me an one for himself."

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

"Pencil eraser."

Girl's weight issues.

'Well, that WAS an impressive string of obscenities, but I think I'll stick with the Hippocratic oath.'

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

"So you found an enormous truffle and still you weren't happy."

"Mr. Carley, would you like to begin today’s session?" "Claustrophobic's therapy session today at 2:00"

"I suspect he might be depressed, let's give him a label and see whether a few years of unemployment and poverty helps his condition!"

"And that was just your sudoku chart."

"He's anxious to resume perpetrating his usual activities."

"So, Ms. Medusa. Let's talk about this fear of snakes you mentioned. Do you notice that it causes anxiety?"

"And what if the assailant comes at you from inside your own head."

Polio - The Comeback Kid

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

What's Their Secret?

"All of my friends are imaginary."

"Someone has stolen my identity crisis."

"Doctor, your client with the multiple personality disorder, is on lines one, two, three and four."

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

"Sorry I'm late again, boss. I got held up in self-doubt and regrets."

'Where'd he go, nurse?'

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

"Don't do it, Sir! Think of your wife, your kids, your home, your mortgage, your council tax, your water raters, your gas, electricity, loan repayments, overdue library books..."

Patient jumps out of window.