Medical Warrior Pillows

Doctor to man: 'We've found a mass. The good news is we have weapons of mass destruction.'

Polio - The Comeback Kid

"He fought like hell."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

'Well, well, well...'

"Your contents have shifted."

Be Healthy

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

The Cougher

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

Exercising

Shrinks in heaven

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

'Your inferiority complex is better than mine.'

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

Burnout Syndrome...

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

'What are you eating now?'

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

'Mom, do I have to hold my plank through desert, too?'

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'