Medical Music Lovers Pillows

"The hip bone's connected to the...' Once you start humming, it all comes back to you."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

Lactose Intolerant

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

'A Caesarian? - But I want my son to be a natural-born citizen!'

"Ugh, we get it - you're in love."

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

'Let me get this straight- you went to a GUY-ne-cologist, to discuss MEN-o-pause?'

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

'Oh, well... Accidents will happen.'

Plum jam...

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

"The colonoscopy isn't your eternal punishment...the prep is."

'My diagnostic software is acting up. It says you are pregnant.'

Saxophonist playing on the map of Cornwall.

'You've got dry scalp.'

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

Disease-y Top

The Uterus in the form of a Ewe

"I think you're suffering from nostalgia, Mr. Prentice."

...As we know, Jesus was a carpenter... but I don't think he actually sang on any of their records..."

"Your veins are too narrow. Let me get our in-house specialist to help."

Snake Charming

'Sure we're underfunded, but we manage!'