Medical Mishap Lover Pillows

'Mr. Jayson, get back into your bandages.'

Barbeque Casualty.

'Is that guy back again? Hey, if you find that sponge I lost, give a shout.'

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"And as if that wasn't bad enough. They've discovered that I'm allergic to bandages!"

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

"Not dead, nonsense! According to the computer you are dead! . . . Please don't waste anymore of out valuable time and leave the operating room!"

'I can't turn it off.'

"Melisa! - Your spelling is atrocious!"

'How's my Surger? Call 1-600 Lawsuit.'

Sling

"I'm certain you're fine, but my attorney would like to see you naked."

"The operation was a huge success, Mr. Smith, but we're going to have to open you up again - we appear to have lost a nurse."

'Ok, Ms. Feldman, it says on your chart that you were discharged yesterday.'

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

Paramedic Mistakes.

Broken legs and broken nose in the hospital.

'Wait a minute! Didn't I see you on 'Funniest Medical Bloopers and Blunders'?'

"Well... the good news is we've dealt with your ingrowing toenail..!"

'Next time make sure it's the bath plug before you pull it out.'

"When I yell 'CLEAR' that doesn't mean you."

CITY HOSPITAL, 'It's all right, officer -- I'm an outpatient.'

'Try not to make this doctor nervous ? this will be his first operation.'

'He accidentally brushed his teeth with hemorrhoid-shrinking cream.'

Broken hospital sign.

Dr. Mooglum made two mistakes. First, he stuck the stethoscope on the patient's forehead, and secondly, he replaced the end with a suction cup.

Sorry, you rolled off the table just as I was going in!