Medical Mishap Fan Gifts

Broken legs and broken nose in the hospital.

Victim of overzealous Heimlich Maneuver!

'I should have warned you about the hazards of being very assertive!'

Dentist X-Ray Machine Issues

"See? Right there - my wedding ring."

Sling

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

The Rugby Throw Up.

Man is injured transporting cacti.

'No, Mr Zarynski...you've got the hospital gown on backwards.'

Medical Curiosities

"Not dead, nonsense! According to the computer you are dead! . . . Please don't waste anymore of out valuable time and leave the operating room!"

Discus accidents.

'I can't turn it off.'

"I'm certain you're fine, but my attorney would like to see you naked."

'Ok, Ms. Feldman, it says on your chart that you were discharged yesterday.'

"Oh, here's the problem. He's got a doohickey on his thingamabob."

Head in the sand.

Paramedic Mistakes.

Maths Fail

I have to let you go, Dobson. I've just found out you were hired because of a computer error.

'No, there is no such thing as generic doctors!'

You've probably heard of "White Coat Syndrome," the phenomenon in which patients exhibit a high blood pressure level in a clinical setting, even though they don't in other settings. Well, you won't get away with that here.

"Well... the good news is we've dealt with your ingrowing toenail..!"

'The bad news is you had two diseases no one in history ever had together, The good news is they canceled each other out'

'You're just going to feel a little pinch, then a horrific burning pain, your eyes will roll back into your head, you will drool uncontrollably...'

CITY HOSPITAL, 'It's all right, officer -- I'm an outpatient.'

Dr. Mooglum made two mistakes. First, he stuck the stethoscope on the patient's forehead, and secondly, he replaced the end with a suction cup.

'He accidentally brushed his teeth with hemorrhoid-shrinking cream.'

Broken hospital sign.

Submarine emerges on top of building