Medical Memer Gifts

"Poison ivy? No, I said you have a poison IV. Honestly, I have no idea why we keep that stuff right next to the medicine."

'Now, 'ol doc, he'd have wrapped 'er the other way.'

Casualty

Text Culture

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'We'll be outsourcing Main Street.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'As you know, medical costs have skyrocketed -- that'll be fifty cents.'

'We're under a lot of time-pressure here, so we'll need to jump to conclusions.'

"Any further comments? Alright then, we're adjourned."

'It's been a tough quarter, so in lieu of bonuses, you'll all be receiving a DVD of out-takes from our meetings.'

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

'It was here when Harris decided to 'tweak' things a bit...'

"We're not doing virtual meetings anymore, Stu."

"Does our improvement really need to be so continuous?"

The Web is mightier than the sword.

Now, gentlemen, doesn't the smaller table make these board meetings more cozy?'

'If youth is wasted on youth, I'd just as well spend my time social networking.'

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

"Dislocating your jaw yawning during my lecture on work related injuries is NOT a work related injury!"

'Please excuse my nurse -- this is her first day on the job.'

'I see your site doesn't have a 'like' button. The good news is it doesn't need one.'

The Evolution of Pop Culture Scapegoats

"And then I met some computer people who could make it look as if I were talking."

Man pondering signpost reading NHS and Complementary Medicine.

'I see a change in matters of the heart, liver, kidneys. . .'

"I hope they're not fake commandments!"

'He was a lifelong knee-jerk liberal until he got knee replacement surgery.'

'She's a little upset. Apparently, when the cosmetic surgeon asked her what kind of chin she'd like, she thought he said gin and asked for a double.'

'Norton, couldn't you have taken care of that before the meeting?'

'They say medicine is a calling. . . but it's days like this I wish I'd had call waiting.'

The Potato Salad Society

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

"I'm thinking of getting out of medicine completely… or volunteering in a third world country to do my liposuction."

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords