Medical Assistants Gifts

"Health professionals prepare syringes for another intense vaccination day."

"You can always tell when we have new patients who need glasses."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

In basket-case.

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"Morning, all!"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Good Luck!

"Because we dismissed his original self-diagnosis, he wants to give us his second opinion."

Shake it all about sign on desk

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

Happy Birthday to you.

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

Obama Healthcare.

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

'It's a new technique for training interns: suture by numbers,'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

'What's holding him up?'

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

In - Out - Pending.

"We've combine the recovery area with the gift shop... just in case your visitors want to pick up a little souvenir."

"Do you have an appointment?"

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

Not much money, glory, or praise

A clerk asking for time off to get married.

InIn by-products.